A Struggle for Speech

I like to tell myself we are not capable of sincerity, of the simple lucidity of speech. That we are too late for innocence. But isn’t innocence always too late for itself? It is always tainted by the corruption from which it seeks to differentiate. But this means, too, that corruption is never entirely corrupt, that there is an innocence in corruption, too. Could I write same of sincerity, of unprotected speech? I admit I am disturbed by the lines I quoted from Van Velde, and even from Beckett. They are too naked, too simple. But their speakers won their way to simplicity! Still, I feel a kind of laughter breaking out in even amidst my great admiration for the lines I copied out. A laughter because such speech every rule of discourse. Who could speak like that? Who would dare? Isn’t it impossible, today, speak in that way? But look at the imposture of this word ‘today’ – as if there were ever a time or a place when one could speak with sincerity! As if, once again, it were not a matter of a struggle for speech, to be able to speak!

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