We've always needed a leader, W. and I agree. We were in Poland several years ago, in Wroclaw town hall square and it became very clear to us: we needed a leader, someone to inspire us and force us to work harder. Someone to make us capable of more than we could accomplish on our own.
For his part, W. has always dreamt of being part of a pack. Friendship is very important to him. – 'You have to work together, to strive together, to force each other on'. Friendship involves a lot of nagging, W. explains, which is why he's so merciless with me. It's a sign of love, he says, his loving. But a leader, that's what we really need, he says.
In truth, we have found several leaders. The first, far cleverer than us, far more serious, wrote a book we admired. We spoke alongside him and were the dull panels of a triptych. We were there only to make him shine all the more, we agreed. It was enough to be close to our leader, enough to give him a background of stupidity on which to set himself against.
But then the disaster happened, W. remembers. We told him, didn't we? We told him he was our leader. We told him what we hoped he'd make us become. We told him of our hopes and fears … That's where it all went wrong, we agree. We scared him off. After that, we resolved never to tell our leaders they were our leaders, but we could never help it.
Didn't the same thing happen with our second leader? – 'Which one of us blurted it out', W. asks, 'you or me?' Regardless, the spell was broken. We had spoke to him of what we lacked and what he had. We spoke of the nectar of knowledge and the bees of the invisible, of the Open and the Closed. We frightened him, we agree.
Then there was the third leader. – 'Ah, our third leader', W. exclaims, 'the greatest one of all'. We brought him halfway round the world! We thought this was it, that we'd finally justified our lives; this was our high point! And what happened?, W. asks, knowing what happened.
We told him all we wanted was a leader and to be led by a leader. We told him about first leader and our second leader, and our desertion by our first leader and our second leader. We told him of the great harvest of ideas, and of the coming end times. We told him of the apocalypse and of waiting for the Messiah …
He was better than us, W. and I agree. He gave, we took. He had had ideas, we had stolen them. He engaged directly with thought, whereas our engagement was meditated by books we half understand. He tried to change the world around him, whereas we've always been parasitical upon people who try and change things. Every day, for him, something new might have occured. Whereas every day, for us, confirmed that nothing new will ever have happened …
Our third would-be leader was not so easily scared. But we think he wanted peers, not disciples. Where is he now? – 'On the other side of the world, far away from us, sensible man', says W.
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